I can't breath at all...

Suddenly have that feeling to kill myself when I am having super big pressure here. I post " I can't breath at all." in my MSN personal status in the whole day. Ate bread for my meal in 3 to 4 days. Without protein and nutrient. So now when I breath I feel my gastric pain again. Not a normal gastric pain. And I am trying to do my assignment, my lovely buddy Yan , comment me and ask how about me. She is the first and the only one who care and take note on my status. She always help me, comfort me and support me when I having trouble and stress here. Some time when I am emo and sad , I don't know go where to find a person to talk, but she is the one who automatically came and ask me. I am so glad and touch that I have a buddy like her. Even my parents also din't call me and ask about my life here, I wish they know there. I know everyone having a same stress and tension too, but I think my stress is double than them, the reason why just Yan will know about it. The time passed so fast, dateline of final is coming soon. In this semester, I like did nothing. And can't see my improvement at all, what the problem to me? I really need to have a big big rest without thinking any idea of assignment and project. I am really lack of idea now.....................................

REST, but not ME

Shut down my phone.
Off the line of facebook and MSN.
Lock myself in the room with the table lamp.
Let them REST one day.
Listen to the soft music.
Listen to the bird singing.
With the cold wind.
Do my assignment Silently.

I am nobody T________T

I live is because of you all.

I die is because of myself.

Because I am nobody in your heart.

I am so Foolish!!!!

Again and again....

Before I sleep I will wish that hope can see him tomorrow again....

Before I sleep I will wish him have a nice day and have a sweet dream....

Before I sleep I will wish we will meet in the dream...

Before I sleep I will wish my dream come true...

Before I sleep I hope my foolish thinking is true....

Maybe that really immature, but I really wish to have it.... XD

女人！

有没有人会觉得做女人很好做？

这个问题，当然会有啊！

很多男人都会去变性，把自己变性成一名女人！

这当然，他们肯能不会面对女人的烦恼吧！

女人啊！女人！

真的不容易做!

第一，做女人真的很冒险，会面临一些可怕的女人病痛。

第二，一些女人会为了要把自己的小孩带到这个世界而失去自己的生命。

第三，长的像什么样子，都会给那些【三八公】讲个一餐。

第四，要美就不要命。就算为了那一点的美，痛也是值得的。

第五，如果有钱，就会出现很多无所事事的男人来骗感情和钱。

第六，时不时也会给心爱的男人抛弃。

这个世界，是拥有报应的。

男人的所作所为，终有一天，你会比女人更惨！

请你们不要再伤害她们了。

他的微笑。 =）

好奇怪，可能这就是射手座的说明吧！

追求自由，宽容和乐观。

开朗的，每天带着笑容的，而心里是不是开心也会带着笑容的去做人。

人家的一句问候或他的一个微笑，会让我永远都记在❤里的。

而有时一不开心，就会很快忘记。这，我就不觉得了。

记得上个星期三，是快要上drawing class, Computer Graphic 完了就和一班女朋友去吃午餐。

在明天，我们遇见刚好要离开的junior, 然后把他们的位子让了给我们。

当时的我啊！满脑都是assignment和final project。真的很烦啊！

在我脑海中，我记得有一位男生，突然向我微笑了。我完全是不认识他的，看见他的微笑让我觉得很窝心。烦恼好像突然消失了。我还送回我的微笑给他。他的微笑是否是给我，这我就不大清楚了。

之前，有时是有遇见过他，但当时的他是很cool的，根本不笑。

他这个微笑，让我很迷惑，也让我紧紧的记在脑海和❤里。

希望不要悲伤案重演。

小丑~

每个人都有自尊心的。

每个人就算是忍让度都会有限度的。

你可以把他们当成笑话来谈，你会觉得好笑，他们也会装，但你是不会看透他们心是有多伤的。

换来是你，你样子长的不是一般的好看，你被人当成笑话来讲，你会开心吗？

可能你是没有自尊心的吧！不是每个人都像你一样！

他们长的像什么样子，难道他们想要的吗？

他们长的像什么样子，难道是你管的吗？

他们宽容你，他们包容你，是因为他们把你当成朋友。

不想一点小问题影响他们对你的友情！

而不像你，把他们当成小丑。

小丑也是人啊！他们也有自尊啊！

在我们的眼前所看见的小丑都是带着笑容的，他们真真的背后伤心故事你又懂吗？

小丑每当你不开心时，都逗你开心，但你一次又一次的去伤害他们。

如果有一天，你看见开心带笑容的小丑突然哭了，变成一个爱哭的小丑。

你是不是觉得他在搞笑呢！

装开心的小丑是很累的，为了带开心给我们，他们觉得累是值得的。

请不要再伤害他们了！

Look back and think back.

I am emo , sometimes is because of the assignment. But I already use to it.
In one day, I felt I did somethings wrong, I went to apologize to my friends and also asked about my mistake.
They said I didn't make any mistake, maybe I really think a lot of it.
So, I tried to text my buddy-Yan. And told her my story and she told a lot of things and comfort me too. In that time, I thought back the passed time that we were in secondary school. We are mature now. The thinking of us are different compare with last time, it should be happy. But I was really immature and damn stupid, I told Yan and myself I won't make the same mistake again. In this few days, I didn't crazy as last time, before I do something I will think before. My dad always think 3 times before you do that thing. Last time, I really didn't listen to him. But now, I find out why he told me that. Is because he loves me, he don't want me to get hurt and distort my life and future. Sometime must get hurt, no pain no gain. And learn from the mistake. Maybe now isn't late that I wake up now, but I really can't forgive the mistake that I did. What should I do now? I don't wish to make them disappointed to me again, I didn't said out the mistake to them. Passed is passed , Over is over. Forget the pass, select the future. Look back and think back the mistake that you did and learn from it. Make sure you won't do that again. =)

Life~ Part 1.

Everyone born out to this world they may need to accept the challenge in this crazy world.
Everyone sure will did somethings wrong and made themselves can't live in this world anymore. So they kill themselves in a secret way. Ya, maybe they didn't know and think about their friends and family will sad. But we should understand them and respect their situation. People said nothing that can't solve in this world, say out, cry out or let it pass with the time. Ya, it will feel better, everyone maybe will forgive them or even the God too. But the only one can't forgive is themselves.
Sometimes, when I am alone I will think about a lot of things. Why people will never give up and live in this world, even how poor they are or how ugly they are, no one will accept them. But they really word hard and study hard to get back to confident from people and the dignity too.
But when I saw those rich people wasting foods, their time and money, if the time they really break down, I won't help them and pity them. These kind of people they are useless. And a lot of people because of money to do somethings wrong to earn money. Money is really important to this world that I can understand everyone will like rich people a lot. Money that can buy a lot of things of cause, but a very funny thing is money will harm people to lost a lot of things too. Example like friendship, family ship, and also their beauty in the heart. The social now is very reality ,everyone likes beauty from outside. Is this important? Nope!!!! I disagree. Beauty is from heart and not the look. When you say people fat, super thin, very short and etc please think about how the feeling if you give people say like that? And also think about yourself is it prefect or not?

The Sun and the Sunflowers.

The Sun will always never know the story behind of the sunflowers.

Sunflower always very confident stand straight and smile to the Sun. Acting like it is very happy and confident. Because of that, the Sun will never ask sunflower about unhappy things. But as we know, sunflower will wilt when sunset.

One day, the Moon met sunflower and ask " Why are you so unhappy there? I though you are always is a very happy flowers in this world. No troubles, and very friendly too."

Sunflower answered "I am just acting happy and confident in front of the Sun and day. I want everyone be happy like me too. I keep my sadness in night, because that no one will know and see actually I am sad here. I don't wish to bring the sadness to everyone. Life should be happy. Although how sad am I, I will always act strong and tough in front of the sun. But I will tired, I wilt when you are here because you and night will understand me."

In this story, I think everyone is acting the same character like sunflower. Who will understand you? This world just have one or two person will really understand the story behind of you. I like sunflower because I am acting the same character of it. Happy it doesn't need money to get it. I am so happy and glad that I have Moon and night will understand me.

外表对一个人真的很重要吗？

在犹豫着，外表真的那么重要吗？

外表不好，不美，难看和丑就不会引人注意吗？

天下的人真的很现实啊，无论在哪一个角落，外表没那么一点的好，就永远收到欢迎的。

是吗？

在功课方面，读书，还是遇到了一些问题是需要男的帮忙，他们都会看外表。

选女友啊，朋友啊，都是一样。

为什么，这个世界就是那么的现实？

高矮肥瘦，是一个人定下来的吗？是她们要的嘛？

你们有没有想过，她们也不想的啊。

生下来就是那样啊，她们没有你们那么的完美。也没你们想象的更加完美。

这个世界是永远没有东西是完美的。

每当你们，要讲一些很刺人的话，请你们想一想，会不会伤害到别人的自尊心？

难道你们没有嘛？

也请你们看一看，她们是否听见吗？

乐观的她们啊，宽容的她们啊，会在你们的面前微笑，就把自己给你们当成笑话。

真的很好笑吗？

倒反是你们，你们会开心吗？

倒反是你们，被人一刀又一刀的刺你们的心，你们难道不会痛吗？

难道你们真的没良心的吗？

不要忘了，世界往往是会有报应的。